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• Illustration: A woman, who had been abused by her husband for years, took her husband to a new pastor, in the hope that the pastor could help her. They went into counseling, and the pastor told her to submit to her husband, even to his beatings.
• There’s a lot wrong with that picture, and there’s a lot wrong with the family in today’s culture.
• Illustration: Statistics of wife abuse: one out of every three women who seeks emergency medical treatment at a doctor's office or hospital is the victim of domestic violence.
• Among Christians, for every 60 married women, 10 are verbally abused, and 2 or 3 are physically abused.
• Illustration/Quote: Reverend Joy Bussert, director of the Battered Women Project for the Minnesota Council of Churches: "Batterers are often pillars of our churches, men who teach Sunday school and serve on the church council."
• Illustration/Quote: One such woman speaks up: "I would never in my wildest nightmares have dreamed that my husband would ever abuse me. But he did…."
• Illustration: Mary was suddenly beaten by her husband for the first time after fifteen years of marriage.
• Psalm 140 has become a fervent prayer of such women.

• Violence is a misuse of authority, and misunderstanding of submission.
• God does not baptize beatings, whether they are verbal, emotional or physical beatings.

• Men have physical power: we need to acknowledge that.
• In Mark 10, Jesus tells us to use our power to serve.
• Illustration/Quote: Richard Foster in The Celebration of Discipline: "The sting of the teaching [on submission] falls upon the dominant partner."
• God says, "Men, I put you on earth to self-sacrifice. I put you on earth to be a protecting force."

• Women, you don’t deserve batterings; you’re not to blame.
• Most women don’t know what triggers their husbands’ rage.
• Illustration: In the movie Sleeping with the Enemy, a husband beats his wife because another man said she was beautiful.
• Women cannot control their husband’s violence.
• Illustration: Christianity Today did an extensive study of battered Christian woman, and they found that two-thirds of these women believed that it was their Christian responsibility to endure their husbands' violence.
• Women do not hold the key to resolving domestic violence.

• The answer begins with theology, the study of the whole Word of God.
• We’ve got to talk about it, and get involved.
• Illustration/Quote: Said a woman from the East Coast, "One of the reasons that mine is a 'success' story—my husband and I are back together after a three-month separation—is because my church took action…"
• There is hope and healing in the person of Jesus rist.